Whenever, However - Lisa Solnik

Her eyes were on me almost the entire worship service- a young woman, sitting in an isolated place, away from everyone else. The expression on her face seemed burdened. Every time I glanced her way, she was looking at me. I felt the tug to go and introduce myself, and shake her hand. But I didn’t.

“Not now,” I told myself. How would she react? Would she even want me to talk to her? I should wait until our paths cross in a more natural way. Or until there’s a break in the service. Then I’ll do it. Without making a spectacle of her or of me.

But coffee time came, I looked over to where she was, and she had gone. I’d missed my chance. When I first felt that tugging – maybe that would have been the time to go.

There’s an old hymn I remember singing in church when I was a kid that goes, “They’ll know we are Christians by our love, by our love. Yes, they’ll know we are Christians by our love. This is what Jesus told His disciples shortly before His death:

“A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. By this all men will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another.” John 13:34-35 NIV

We know we’re supposed to do this, but walking it out can be hard. Personally, I tend to over-think. I wouldn’t want to love people in the wrong way. I wouldn’t want to offend them unintentionally or make them uncomfortable.

Pride plays into it as well. How will I be perceived by the people around me? Will they think I’m trying to show off? What if I fall on my face or do some equally awkward thing, as I’m prone to do?

Worse yet, what if I’m rejected? What if the person has no need or want for my interaction with them? Could I handle it? Maybe it wasn’t actually the Lord prompting me to go. How stupid would I feel?

About a month ago, in my journal, I said to Him, “I still feel very confused about when and how to talk to people.”

The words came to mind: Whenever. However.

Could it really be that simple?

1 Timothy 1:5 says that love “comes from a pure heart and a good conscience and a sincere faith” (NIV). So if my heart and intentions are pure – that is, I really want to love that person because Jesus loves them; and my conscience is cleansed – I’m in an honest place with God, forgiven; and my faith is sincere – I believe He can and will move in their heart in His timing…is there anything else to worry about?

Surely, I shouldn’t worry about my feelings being hurt, or about being embarrassed, if Jesus says we are to love others as He’s loved us. He was humiliated. He was rejected. He was scorned, beaten, tortured, and killed in a public place…and none of that stopped Him.

As far as the person being offended or uncomfortable – what are the chances of that, if I’m approaching in a loving way? I’ve always felt blessed when someone has come over to say hi or share a little encouragement. Nonetheless – although Jesus didn’t set out with the purpose of offending people, He didn’t let it stop Him if He did. Even if they were destined for Hell, he cared about that and told them so. “‘You snakes! You brood of vipers! How will you escape being condemned to hell?’” Matthew 23:33 NIV

And finally, was it actually the Lord prompting me? I would ask myself another question. Would it ever not be His will for me to share His love with someone who may need it? Sometimes, the things that seem small can be the most difficult. For me, it feels easier to teach a Sunday school class than to approach and greet someone I don’t know. And yet these small, face-to-face interactions can have profound impact.

Let’s look at Peter, who often has the reputation of being one of Jesus’ boldest disciples. He was a leader among them, and the only one to get out of the boat and walk on water. He told Jesus He was ready to be killed for His sake. But when his opportunity for a shining moment came, it wasn’t before the Sanhedrin. It was face-to-face with a servant girl. And he tanked:

“‘You are not one of his disciples, are you?’ the girl at the door asked Peter.

He replied, ‘I am not.’” John 18:17 NIV

If Peter struggled, so will we. Likewise, if Jesus gave Peter second, third, fourth, and fifth chances, He will do the same for us. Later having risen from the dead, Jesus speaks with Peter:

“When they had finished eating, Jesus said to Simon Peter, ‘Simon son of John, do you truly love me more than these?’

‘Yes, Lord,’ he said, ‘you know that I love you.’

Jesus said, ‘Feed my lambs.’” John 21:15 NIV

Nonetheless, some of us may need to re-think our idea of what “ministry” looks like. I’ve often longed for a role in some kind of ministry to people but recently, as I prayed about it, I felt the Lord say deep in my spirit – “Shouldn’t you learn to talk to them first?”

Ouch. But yes, He’s right. Why would God give me a role or a platform or some other kind of special opportunity if I don’t have the love to walk across the room?

As I heard one preacher say, although we often pray for ‘boldness’ in evangelism, that may not be what we really need. We don’t need more boldness. We need more love.

Lord, forgive me for my selfishness; my pride. Redeem and heal the places within me that are still broken; still preventing me from doing your will in the world. Give us love for one another. Love that is true, and pure; love that will show the world that we are yours. Amen.